Mid-Life Crisis? 10 steps
you must take now to save your life
September, 2007
By Craig Nathanson - The Vocational Coach
Save your life?
After 40 one tends to be more aware of their time left and
the things which are undone in their life. While it usually
takes a crisis to become more aware, this doesn’t always
move one to make change in their life, especially in areas which
are no longer bringing joy and meaning. The mid-life crisis
can come in big or small packages. Illness, divorce, layoff,
death of a loved one are big packages. Daily boredom, un-ease,
sadness, unhappiness or even depression are simply signs that
something is no longer working in one’s life. After age
40 and frankly at any age, it is critical to pay attention to
these inner signals. Here are the ten critical steps you must
take now to redesign your life for more joy, happiness and meaning.
1. Stop working
That’s right, you read this correct. Stop working and
start living. Living with daily joy, happiness and purpose is
worth striving for. It is enjoyable and refills the water glass
of life with more energy, more passion and more excitement!
Start by finding new work which feels like a better alignment
of what you truly are interested in and either have or can learn
the required abilities. Many people continue to simply work
at things which they are good at but no longer have interest
in.
2. Find some greater purpose
Identify and find something you feel strongly about or which
bothers you about the world and do something about it. For example
in America, it bothers me that we are spending billions of dollars
in needless wars while our own cities fall apart. We are now
a nation of have and have-not’s when it comes to medical
care. Our educational system is deeply flawed with too much
focus on scores and grades and little focus on learning; not
to mention too costly as well.
Pick something which really bothers you and build a life purpose
around it. Your life will never be the same for the better
3. Stand up for your beliefs
Don’t be afraid to finally live your life through your
causes. Drive yourself finally through internal reward vs. external
recognition. Replace old beliefs which are no longer useful
with new ones which better serve you
4. Be resilient
Stay focused- strive for more happiness in your life. Make
this a goal in itself. Be selfish and define for yourself what
being happy really means to you. Despite the barriers and hurdles
we must all cross on the journey to more meaning and fulfillment
in our lives, keep this vision clear at all times
5. Stay organized and structured
Have a plan for your life. This includes your daily living
and your long term goals. Without a plan for one’s life
with clear intent, when the crisis hits and it will, your personal
roadmap and plan will get you through
6. Surround yourself with love
There is no need to be lonely in one’s life. Surround
yourself with people you love. If necessary, find new people
to love and receive love from. Build up your relationships in
your life which nurture and support your personal roadmap.
7. Learn to accept your mistakes
This is easier said then done! We are good at beating ourselves
up when things go wrong and seldom take the time to reflect
when things go well. How can you be more of our own best friend?
Learn to accept you as you are. Ask yourself; what can I learn
from this past experience? What new wisdom can I gain from my
actions? Realize that everything you do or did was for a good
reason at the time. Learn to love yourself more and others will
too.
8. Don’t let the mundane slow you down
Don’t let the mundane aspects of life slow you down.
Yes, laundry has to be washed, cars need gas, lunches need to
be made, and bills need to be paid. Ensure however that each
and every day you identify the most important actions you must
take to move you towards what you want vs. what you do not want
in your life.
9. Take care of your body and mind
Eat well, sleep well and exercise daily. Take time each day
to reflect on your feelings and thoughts. Heard this before?
Well, it works. When our bodies and minds are stressed, we lose
sight of our goals and what is most important to us in our lives.
Writing is a good way to reflect on how you doing. Start a daily
journal- just before bed; answer the question; what did I learn
today about myself and others?
10. Seek joy not pain
Re-align your life and your work around the sole purpose of
acquiring more joy, meaning and happiness in your life. This
is in abundance in the world. You just must redesign your life
with the intent to create more of it for yourself.
Mid-life Crisis?
Refocus your attention now on what would be perfect for you
in your life. Create a new vision and take small steps each
and every day with the intent towards creating more joy in your
life. It will make your crisis suddenly feel like a crusade.
This is good.
As always, I’ll be cheering you on as you go- Craig Nathanson
Craig Nathanson is the author of P Is For Perfect: Your Perfect
Vocational Day and a coaching expert who works with people over
forty. Craig’s new E-book, Discover and live your passion
365 days a year is a workshop in a box designed to help busy
adults go insane with their work. Craig’s systematic approach,
the trademark "Ten P" process,’’ helps
people break free and move toward the work they love. Visit
Craig’s online community at http://www.thevocationalcoach.com
where you can take a class, get more ideas through Craig Nathanson’s
books and CD’s, get some private coaching over the phone
or read other stories of mid-life change and renewal.
Craig lives and works in Petaluma, California. His office is
located atP.O Box 2823, Petaluma Ca, 94953. You can reach him
at 707-775-4020 or at craig@thevocationalcoach.com.
Craig's Vocational Passion Newsletters are edited by Anita
Flegg at The Sharp Quill. The Sharp Quill -- www.sharpquill.com
-- specializes in writing and editing for small business. You
can see Anita's vocational story at http://www.thevocationalcoach.com/_vocational_community/_real_stories/story_anita.html
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